


Of Puppies and Patchwork

by coffeeandcream_mei



Series: Of Lists and Galaxies AU [2]
Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Female Byun Baekhyun, Female Kim Joonmyun | Suho, Gen, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Kid Sehun, Light Angst, Romance, Slice of Life, kid Tao
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-31
Updated: 2017-08-31
Packaged: 2018-12-22 05:25:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 16,267
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11960616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/coffeeandcream_mei/pseuds/coffeeandcream_mei
Summary: Junmyeon and her boys slowly get used to Yifan as addition to their little family, but every time Junmyeon thinks routine will finally settle yet another thing throws their life together around.





	Of Puppies and Patchwork

**Author's Note:**

> This was supposed to be shorter, but in the earlier stages of writing the lovely encorelight on AFF approached me about a sequel idea she had but unfortunately had no time writing for. I have placed that idea to parts into this story and I hope she is happy with it. 
> 
> Few more author notes added at the bottom of the fanfic for the sake of not spoiling the story here. Go grab a cuppa tea, a fluffy blanket and get comfortable for a loooooooooooong read. 
> 
> Comments would be lovely of course.

“Higher!” Sehun demands and lets a squeal of delight when Yifan hoists him up.

Junmyeon watches fondly as the three - the taller Zitao with a ladder and Sehun on Yifan’s shoulders - stick an army of stars to the ceiling of Sehun’s new room. The brows of her boyfriend and her youngster furrow identically in concentration and she realizes not for the first time how much Yifan looks as if he was their actual father. Tao calls him gently Papa Yifan if he wants a favor and as good younger brother Sehun picked that habit up fast as well.

Junmyeon never thought that a new relationship would be possible for her after the divorce. Her life revolves around Tao and Sehun and she had been determined to focus on them until they are grown up and can live without her general protection and care.

No, Junmyeon does not regret letting Yifan in. Quickly he has wriggled himself into her sons’ tiny hearts and never has been complicated or insensitive where it came to Junmyeon’s ex-husband. It is very obvious that the two do not like each other much, but if she was honest Junmyeon would have been worried had they become friends.

Occasionally she is overwhelmed by the gentleness and understanding with which Yifan loves her. He has never been pushy about intimacy and waited for her to come to him. When they have time for themselves he cherishes her body so extensively that she feels 21 and ready to rule the world again. Once she brought that she felt the care she receives a little unfair for his own desires, but he briefly explained that pleasuring her was perfectly satisfying and arousing to him and that had been the last word spoken about it.

Nonetheless Junmyeon has been a little frisky in his (locked) office during overtime because he had dropped certain hints and she had not opposed the idea in any way. On a sexual level Junmyeon has never felt so comfortable and excited to explore in her whole life and on an emotional level Yifan has taught her well to let go of control and relax about several issues. He is good to her and he loves her sons, it is all Junmyeon could wish for.

That does not mean she had not opposed at first when Yifan started showing her larger flats in a better and more expensive part of Seoul.

“I’m not asking you to marry me, Junmyeon. All I want is to be in the same home with you three every day and neither your nor my flat has that capacity.”

“You have to keep the financial aspect in mind, it will cost at least one third of my current rent in addition.”

“Of course, but we can split the rent equally and Tao and Sehun’s school is close by. You won’t need to drive them or pay for public transport. They can walk and learn a little independence. But if you feel this is too much commitment too early, then I’ll leave it.”

Junmyeon is a person to be reasoned with and eventually the ‘what if’ had won and the flats had indeed looked ideal. Yifan’s eyes had lit up when she approached him with her favorite choices and now they call a spacy four-bedroom-flat close to the boys’ school their new home. Yifan had been tremendous help with the moving process; after his possessions merely took a single day to transport from A to B he had motivated the boys to sort out everything they did not want anymore and even drove to an orphanage with them to drop off everything that was in a good condition. Junmyeon remembers how quiet her boys were over dinner that evening, remembers them crawling into her bed at night with mumbled ‘I love you’s and and ‘thank you for being here’.

All in all Yifan has both a humbling and encouraging effect on Tao and Sehun, something Junmyeon absolutely approves of.

In tow with Yifan also came a few friends that helped lifting, packing, putting apart and back together all sorts of furniture and Junmyeon is thankful for all the help they received. She also quite likes his friends who only asked to be invited to the housewarming party in return for their help.

At the moment it is only more unpacking and final touches on the boys’ rooms left as they settle in fully.

“Mommy, do you like it?” Sehun asks, beaming at her from his throne on Yifan’s shoulders. She can see her boyfriend slowly losing energy under the weight.

“It looks wonderful.” She comments on the picture over her head.

Yifan has made them stick the plastic stars in stellar constellations. They finished the little masterpiece with Sirius, the little wolf, who is now looming over her three men. It looks almost protective and Junmyeon indeed finds that wonderful.

“You did a great job.” She continues with praise before patting her son’s leg. “But now let’s get you down from Yifan’s shoulders and back to earth.”

Although Sehun protests a little he allows Yifan to set him down and wanders off to his corner with games and his DS.

“It’s because you’re fat for someone so tiny.” Tao teases and his brother whips around with a glare on his chubby face.

“You just wait, I’ll be just as tall as you and much much thinner!”

“Guys” Yifan eases “you’re both very healthy. It’s just me who’s not strong enough to carry you for a long time.”

“That’s because you sit behind a desk all day.” Tao remarks cheekily as Yifan rolls his shoulders.

Junmyeon opens her mouth to chastise him, but Yifan laughs and pulls Tao close to ruffle and mess up his hair, well aware of Tao’s lately developed fondness of a proper hairstyle.

“So do you at school, you rascal. How about you and I start doing sports from now on? Two times a week let’s go for a run, what do you say?”

“It’s on!” Tao declares eagerly and Junmyeon shakes her head at the two.

Sehun spares them no thought, too engrossed in his video games collection and Junmyeon thinks it definitely will do her son good if he has a hobby outside of their own four walls.

“Sehunnie, do you want to go with Yifan and Tao?” Junmyeon inquires softly at which Sehun shakes his head rapidly.

“I don’t like PE or doing sports.” He informs his mother firmly. Tao scoffs.

“Sure, that’s why you like imitating the dances of those groups Mommy watches sometimes.”

“Thut up!” Sehun yells, ears turning beet red and he shoves his older brother. Junmyeon stands between them before their argument turns into a full-on physical fight and glares at Tao right after who takes a step back immediately.

“Exposing other people’s secrets is a bad thing to do and I hope you will not do it again.”

To Junmyeon’s satisfaction her oldest nods and mumbles a quiet apology. Sehun accepts it rather aloof, flush meanwhile having spread down his neck.

“Do you want to learn how to dance, Sehunnie?” Junmyeon asks gently “We can find a dance school if you like.”

“I want, yes.” Sehun admits silently.

“Well, I’m sure we can find you a good place.” Junmyeon assures him. “But can we move to the table now, dinner is getting cold.”

“Dinner!” Sehun exclaims excitedly and runs ahead, soon followed by Tao. Yifan smiles fondly and hugs Junmyeon before speaking up.

“And now be honest, do you really like what we did with the ceiling?”

Junmyeon sighs into his chest. It is only their first day living in the new flat and she is already exhausted.

“The tiny rainbows are quite something, but as long as Sehun loves them they are fine with me. The stellar constellations are a really wonderful idea though.”

Yifan nods satisfied and kisses the top of her head.

“Sehun really likes stars. He told me it would be really great to become one.”

“Oh my!” Junmyeon laughs before she steps out of his embrace. From the kitchen the sound of scraping chairs can be heard and she sighs softly.

“Come on, let’s not make them wait.”

 

 

~

 

It has been a peaceful Sunday morning up to this point. Junmyeon had woken up to a message from Yifan that he went out to buy things for making them all a British breakfast and she has had another full hour of sleep before the familiar bounce of Tao and Sehun jumping into her bed woke her. Each son tugged under one arm she is ready to drift back to slumber when Sehun’s innocent question bolts her wide awake.

“Mommy, when are we getting a sibling?”

Junmyeon stares at her youngest in disbelief, his eyes showing the earnesty in his question and she suppresses the urge to groan annoyed.

“You won’t get a sibling.” She states firmly and combs through Sehun’s hair. “What makes you think that Yifan and I want a baby?”

“Dad said in a normal family the man and the woman have a baby and Dad and you both have a new family, so we thought since Dad married Yeeun and she is having a baby soon that Yifan and Mommy will have a baby too.” Tao explains seriously.

Junmyeon cannot say that she is surprised by the news that her ex-husband and his second wife are becoming parents. During the years of Wei Zhe and her marriage he had often pressured her about wanting more children than just Zitao and Sehun. If he had had the last word Junmyeon would not only have her two boys, but at least two more girls and another son. It seems that Yeeun, only in her mid-twenties and still in her fertility prime, is more than willing to fulfill his dream of a huge family. Junmyeon makes a mental note to be nice when Yeeun asks her for help and another to tell Wei Zhe what she thinks of his version of ‘a normal family’.

“Your Dad and Yeeun want more babies while Yifan and I don’t plan to, but Yeeun’s baby is going to be your sibling too. You will be great big brothers, don’t you think?”

Tao frowns next to her, the corners of Sehun’s lips turning down. Oh no.

“But we already agreed that I will be the favorite big brother to Yeeun’s baby and Sehun to yours.” Tao protests and for a moment Junmyeon stops breathing.

Yifan decides to enter their bedroom just in this moment, expression turning from tired and gentle to confused as Sehun screeches in protest that they agreed it to be the other way round. He seems to see through her shock immediately however.

“Good morning you three. Tao, Sehun, could you set up the table? I made British breakfast.”

“With bacon?” Tao asks and jumps out of bed at Yifan’s nod. “Come on Sehun, let’s go.”

Junmyeon waits for the door to fall close behind them before she groans and rolls onto her stomach to bury her head in her pillow. The mattress dips and she feels Yifan stretch out next to her.

“Hey” he calls gently “want to tell me what happened?”

“They think you and I are going to give them a little brother or sister.” Junmyeon speaks into the cushion.

They have not talked about this. The topics marriage and kids are so far away and Junmyeon really is not ready for it now, despite what her sons prompted.

“Certainly you don’t look pregnant to me.”

Junmyeon lifts her head to glare at Yifan.

“Are you try to be smooth by telling me I’m too thin?”

“I’m trying to lift the mood. Why do the boys think they’ll have a sibling?” Yifan asks and rocks a little closer to kiss her, but Junmyeon is not soothed yet.

“Because they will. Yeeun’s pregnant and their father told them” she raises her hands to quote ”a ‘normal’ family is when a man and his wife have a baby.”

“Oh, and they assume-”

“Yeah.” Junmyeon interrupts him.

“I guess we will have to teach the boys about all the different kinds of families then.” Yifan suggests lightly and this is why Junmyeon loves him. This is why she is glad she allowed him into her heart and the boys’ life.

Yifan could use the moment to ask why she seems so violently displeased about possibly carrying his child, demand for her to be more explicit about how she sees their future, but he does not. Instead he stays calm and considerate and thinks of a solution to what is more her problem than his. On top of it, of course, stands the fact that he is tolerant and accepting.

“We can tell them about Baekhyun and Taeyeon and my mother raising me by herself. If they think a baby is necessary then we can show them it is not essential to happiness.” Yifan resumes and Junmyeon pecks him.

“Why are you so perfect? Tell me, which manhwa did you escape from?”

“Pokémon?” Yifan jokes and rolls out of bed in laughter when Junmyeon hits him for that comment with her pillow. He is never going to let her down over that pair of Bulbasaur panties.

“So, are we getting a sibling?” Tao asks, a half-eaten piece of bacon dangling from his lips. Junmyeon does not remember teaching him such table manners.

“First of all please eat properly” Yifan chastises him and takes the bacon out of his mouth “and secondly Junmyeon already told you no.”

“Does that mean we’re not a real family?” Sehun wonders quietly and makes the face he always does before he starts crying. Meanwhile Tao has started to glare at Yifan.

“We thought you love Mom!”

“I love your mother very much and I love you two, too.”

“Then why don’t you marry Mom and have a baby!” Tao hisses and throws his fork on the table.

Junmyeon takes a deep breath to issue a lesson on respect and manners, but Yifan places a hand on top of hers and looks at her pleadingly. _Fine_.

“Why do you two think we’re not a real family?”

“Dad said it.” Sehun explains with glassy eyes “He keeps asking when you two are going to become a real family for us.”

Junmyeon is going to kill him.

“Can I ask you something?” Yifan continues seemingly unfazed “Do you think Aunties Baekhyun and Taeyeon and their beagle puppies are happy?”

As her sons nod Junmyeon regains composure and exchanges a glance with Yifan before continuing.

“Baekhyun and Taeyeon love each other like Yifan and I love each other and they love their dogs the way we love you. Would you say they need a baby to be a family?”

“No Mom.” Sehun replies while Tao starts pouting.

“Or Uncle Minseok and Aunt Luhan, they cannot make a baby themselves, but soon there will be a baby living with them that lost their Mom and Dad. They will take care of it as if it was their own. Do you think they aren’t a family, because Luhan wasn’t pregnant with their baby?” Junmyeon asks Tao who looks down and mumbles a ‘no’ while shaking his head.

“You know” Yifan adds with a smile “Mama Wu and I have been a family for a long time, just her and me. Junmyeon and you have also been a real family before you allowed me to join.”

“Mh! Mommy and Tao are my family.” Sehun exclaims and adds after a moment

“And step dad Yifan too.”

The fond beam Yifan shoots Sehun makes Junmyeon a little weak in the knees.

“So… family is when you love each other?” Tao concludes carefully and Junmyeon nods at him, proud that he understood what they tried to teach them.

“Dad lied to us, then?”

“What your Dad meant to say” Yifan explains diplomatically “is that he and Yeeun love each other so much that they want a baby to share their love with and he thinks perhaps Junmyeon and I should do that too.”

It is silent for a while, almost peacefully so and Junmyeon hopes that this has been the last discussion for the day when-

“Mom, can we have a puppy instead?”

 

 

~

 

“Which torture method is currently on your mind?” Yifan asks her as Junmyeon slides under the cover on her side of the bed.

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Junmyeon tries to avoid the question, but she can tell how little it works when Yifan’s eyebrows shoot up to his hairline.

“So I absolutely just imagined the last five minutes you spent on the phone in the living room, yelling at Huang Wei Zhe about how you, I quote, “don’t want our sons to grow into homophobic, patriarchic monsters”.”

“Technically it wasn’t yelling.” Junmyeon defends herself and shakes her head. It probably was a mistake that Wei Zhe and her have not spoken about sensitive topics such as their views on family and sexuality, but it seems after today another talk about Zitao’s and Sehun’s upbringing needs to be scheduled.

“Only practically, you mean?” Yifan comments with a chuckle. “I know that I’m the last person expected to say this, but I believe he was just being extremely clumsy trying to explain Tao and Sehun about their new sibling without making them feel replaced. Yelling at him will get us nowhere.”

“You’re right” Junmyeon agrees “you’re indeed the last person I’d expect such understanding from and I hate to admit it, but you’re right, too, about the yelling. Doesn’t mean it didn’t feel good to yell at him.”

“Doesn’t it always?” Yifan smiles.

It _is_ true. Yifan and Wei Zhe have been dislike at first sight. Junmyeon is glad the two men are adults enough to keep their mutual disapproval of the other hidden from the boys and so it comes as a real surprise to see Yifan defending him. Ever since Yifan came into Junmyeon’s life as more than her supervisor at work, Wei Zhe has tried to meddle in their relationship and more days than is healthy it angers Junmyeon.

He had filed for divorce, had told her to move out as fast as possible and had treated her like she could be disposed of. To her the comments towards Tao and Sehun about how Yifan and her plans to move on in the future seem more like another cunning way of manipulating her. Junmyeon supposes that Wei Zhe will never fully stop seeing her as one of his old possessions.

Yifan, he treats her with respect, with a good mix of honesty and admiration and it is also thanks to him that she realized how much time she wasted in her marriage and how strongly she had denied her individuality and personality for the man she had loved.

With Wei Zhe fights usually consisted of her trying to push something through by pleading and arguing and ended with him belittling her and her ideas. Opposed to that she sometimes yells at Yifan, is angry at him, screams out what she thinks and he gives her just as good, neither intimidating nor intimidated. By the end of the day, even when they are upset with one another, the unspoken ‘I love you’ lies in the arm he puts over her body and the hand she places above his.

In retrospective the divorce is the best thing, after Tao and Sehun, that could have happened to her, Junmyeon muses.

But she is also aware how easily her current happiness can be shaken and shatter and as much as she hates to admit it, she often is still scared that Yifan will wake up one morning and decide he had a good time, but he has enough of a commitment with a woman that leaves him mostly in the dark about their shared future. Not to mention that he has to help raising two children that are not his own. Yifan wants a child with her, Junmyeon is at least ninety percent sure of that and as childish as that may be, she prefers to drag the time until their inevitable fight about it out for as long as possible. For Junmyeon it has been clear after Sehun’s birth that she wants no more children.

But what if that is not enough for Yifan?

“Either way I think we need to talk to the other two about this change of situation.” Yifan continues, oblivious to Junmyeon’s internal struggle. “Yeeun will be very stressed out and exhausted once the baby is there and if we don’t speak about new visiting times and how to make the boys understand they aren’t cast aside for their sibling, I foresee a big problem for all involved.”

“You’re right. I guess we should invite the two over for dinner on Saturday.” Junmyeon sighs.

“Do you want me to do it?”

“No-no. While I think they should reach out to us about this I also believe it’s better when I call. Just remember the last time you picked up when Wei Zhe called.”

Yifan frowns at the memory and growls lowly.

“Well, can’t argue that. What do you say about the boys’ wish for a puppy?”

“I’m not sure. Even a small dog means a lot responsibility and work. I have my doubts that the boys will take as much care of the dog as they promised us and in the end it will be all on me to walk and feed it. Both of us work most of the day and the dog will be at home alone. Do you think it’s smart?” Junhee replies hesitantly.

“I agree that those are big factors, but why don’t we have a little faith in Tao and Sehun? It won’t hurt them to learn how to be responsible for another living being with all its positive and negative consequences and it will take their mind off all the baby business that is heading their way.”

“We still have to walk, feed and train it.” Junmyeon reminds him rather unenthusiastically.

“That’s true. Tao and I can take over the morning walk and for the afternoon we can pay someone to do it or go together after dinner. It surely won’t hurt Sehun to get out of the house more often.” Yifan argues and it makes Junmyeon smile how badly he conceals that he is on Tao’s and Sehun’s side of the topic.

“Why don’t you just outright admit that you want a puppy, too?” Junmyeon asks him, smile getting wider when the arm around her waist pulls her in, back pressing to Yifan’s chest.

“Because you’re the boss in this household. You’re having the final word anyway, so what does pleading help me?”

“Oh, is that so?” Junmyeon teases.

“Remember, your sons employed me as your assistant after all, nothing more.” Yifan explains and kisses the nape of her neck, a pleasant shiver running down Junmyeon’s spine.

“Mh, perhaps I can be convinced to agree.” She hints and presses her pelvis into his body playfully. Yifan’s reaction is immediate, his hands leaving her waist and sliding under her nightgown while he spreads more kisses over her skin.

“Well, I have been told that convincing people is one of my strengths.”

Junmyeon allows herself to drown in his affections, to be wrapped up in his hold and she knows that she does not need to tell him that he can, indeed, back up what people say about him.

 

 

~

 

Junmyeon does not know why she is so nervous. After all she did her research well and Yifan and her have made the decision together.  
“Are we there soon?” Sehun chimes impatiently in the backseat and Junmyeon knows that his face is pressed to the car window.

Today they are going to choose the puppy, which will soon be living with them if everything goes according to plan. Junmyeon has visited the breeder two weeks prior to take a look at the living conditions and the latest born. The professionalism and warmth the breeder had shown led to Junmyeon making the decision they would get their puppy from her. Although immune to cooing over human babies the litter of fluff has immediately taken Junmyeon’s heart as whole. Now she is excited which specific ball of fur will wrap her three men around their little paw.

“Ten more minutes.” Yifan promises as he leaves the highway at Daegu. Junmyeon purposefully waited to have him meet the puppies, because his excitement is palpable and she finds it truly endearing how her thirty-six years old partner turns into a giddy pre-schooler at the prospect of possessing a tail-wagging animal in the size of a handbag.

“There are going to be soooooo many dogs.” Tao says dreamy. “Mommy, are all of the dogs there tea poodles?” 

“Teacup poodles, darling and yes, they are. I expect you to be gentle with the puppies.” 

“Of course.” Tao huffs offended.

Junmyeon has based her choice of breed on several factors. The puppy needs to be small enough to be kept in a flat and not too strong for Tao and Sehun to hold the leash without getting dragged around. It needs to need little walking time, to be too adorable for her sons to resist and Junmyeon does want an intelligent pet, one that can be taught and raised well. Teacup poodles have been recommended to her, specifically by Baekhyun’s girlfriend Taeyeon who also advised her to go directly to a breeder despite the prize for a pure breed being much higher than from an animal shelter.

“Hooray, we arrived!” Sehun exclaims when Yifan parks the car in front of the breeder’s house. Junmyeon can hardly hold Tao and him back, the two out of the car faster than she can yell that they need to be careful because of the traffic. Thankfully Yifan keeps a calm hand on each boy’s shoulder while they wait for the front door to open.

The breeder’s daughter lets them in, not without giving Yifan an all too obvious one-over and Junmyeon feels little bubbles of possessiveness and jealousy prickling under her skin. Yifan seems unfazed, sparing the teenager no second look as he enters and introduces himself and Junmyeon’s sons to the breeder. Junmyeon uses the moment to glare hostile at the young woman who now scans Yifan’s backview. _Do young girls have no more sense of decency these days?_

“If you three are ready then we should immediately go seeing the litter, don’t you agree?” The breeder suggests and smiles at Tao’s and Sehun’s excitedly shouted ‘yes’ and Yifan’s enthusiastic nods. Junmyeon stays behind as they enter the room, gleeful squeals and cooing following immediately and she watches with a smile as the breeder patiently explains about the right and wrong ways to hold and play with the puppies.

There is a flurry bustling of light brown fur, yipping and jumping, climbing all over Sehun and Tao lifts one after another up to let the tiny pets lick his face. Puppy kisses. Yifan meanwhile smiles fondly at a tiny one with black collar that nibbles at his fingers. Every of the seven puppies has a different color collar. Tao plays with red and white, Sehun is buried under yellow, green and blue and the one with purple has curled up in Junmyeon’s lap and is very well on its way to sleep. They are all very adorable.

Black eventually escapes Yifan’s hands and chases the ball Tao rolls around while the mother of the litter taps over to Junmyeon and joins her puppy. It is a little heavy, but she does not mind. On the other side of the room Sehun has joined the game, bunch of fluff running back and forth as they roll the ball between them.

The breeder’s daughter catches the yellow one and places it in Yifan’s lap, stroking over the fur without doubt with the intention to ‘accidentally’ touch his hands ever so often and that Yifan does not stop her makes Junmyeon seethe inside. The tension in her body must be felt by the two dogs in her lap, since they wake up and join the rest in her sons’ exciting game.

Junmyeon observes the spectacle for a while. On her first visit purple and red had stuck to her like glue and while Junmyeon felt very happy about it she needs a family dog, one that is not fixated on one person only but protective of the whole pack so to say. The gleeful yips and barks the tiny puppies let as they keep chasing are making her feel as warm inside as the unveiled joy on her sons’ faces. For sure now even she is convinced that having a dog is going to be a great addition to their patchwork of a family.

Black stops in the middle of the chase and looks at her with a rapidly wagging tail before tripping all the way over to Junmyeon. They muster each other for a moment, the pup sitting expectantly in front of her. Then Junmyeon pats her thighs and the puppy takes her indicated invitation and jumps right into her lap. It makes Junmyeon laugh and she busies herself with the little one, scratching behind the ears, caressing the soft fur and engaging in the play of finger nibbling the pup has played with Yifan before.

“Softly.” Junmyeon demands as the sharp canines press into her skin and retrieves her fingers shortly in hope the pup understands. Unfortunately the next playful nibble resembles a quick bite and Junmyeon would not be surprised if skin breaks.

“I said _softly_.” Junmyeon commands and the puppy immediately stops, even licks her fingers apologetic.

“Good pup.”

At her praise the puppy’s tail wags at high speed and Junmyeon allows it to resume playing, now more careful with its teeth. Yifan shifts close to her side and strokes over the body, his large hands making the pup seem even smaller than it already is, but also making it look like he can protect it easily like this. Something warm stirrs inside Junmyeon at the sight.

“I think this one really likes you.” Yifan says easily and Junmyeon cannot help smiling in agreement.

“The dog will need a firm hand while being raised. It is important that they know who the leader of their pack is - and it is not them.” The breeder explains. “The authority in your household needs to be established clearly and unmistakably.”  
As she says it the breeder looks pointedly at Yifan.

“Don’t worry” Sehun tells the breeder “I don’t think anyone doubts that Mom’s the boss.”

Like that Junmyeon finds herself the center of attention. Both her sons smile at her, supportive but also oblivious to the blow Sehun delivered to the general assumption that a man is the head of their family. Junmyeon is proud of raising them so well.

“I agree. Junmyeon is without doubt going to be the leader a tiny puppy needs.” Yifan says with a chuckle.

It is suddenly very hard to resist the urge of pressing a kiss to his lips, but Junmyeon refrains from it nonetheless. She may not need Yifan to validate her, but it feels nice either way that he has her back in a situation like this.

“That’s good to hear. I suggest we move to the kitchen for a little more talking and something to drink.”

They help setting the litter and their mother back into their huge box and Junmyeon only reluctantly lifts the pup off her lap to let it join its siblings. She is almost out of the door when a high-pitched howl rips through the air and she whips around to the source of noise.

Tiny black eyes look at her pleadingly and Junmyeon’s heart jolts painfully. As she walks back in and approaches the pup the volume decreases and when the tiny head of the black-collared pup nuzzles into her outstretched palm, Junmyeon knows they have to look no longer.

The pup has chosen them.

 

 

Upon Yifan’s suggestion the pup, male, is named Chocoball. For the following five weeks until the pup is old enough to be permanently separated from its litter they visit twice more and Junmyeon notes with amusement that her three men have taken turns striking through every day on the family planer in the kitchen that passes until the pick-up date.

Wei Zhe has meanwhile accused her on the phone of only buying the dog as means of competition against their sibling. Junmyeon had right out laughed at the ridiculousness of it. If anything their Chocoball has the tasks to teach Tao and Sehun about responsibility and at the same time to distract them from asking their mother to set an second step-sibling into this world for them.

Everything is set for the big day: a weekly plan who walks Chocoball at which time, puppy school every second Saturday, plenty of baskets and blankets as well as food, collars, leashes and toys are bought and Junmyeon found dog raising guidebooks for kids and adults, which Yifan and her read over the weeks. Baekhyun finds it utterly amusing.

“Do I get this right, instead of engaging in intimacy when the boys are asleep you two read guidebooks to each other every night?”

“Keep your voice low, please Baekhyun.” Junmyeon hisses, because the fact that she is dating her own supervisor is an ever-interesting part of company gossip and she does not intend to fuel it.

“I don’t know why you find this so funny. We’re not teenagers anymore and don’t need to have sex constantly. Chocoball is joining us this weekend and we want to be prepared. As a dog owner yourself you should understand.”

“I do. But that doesn’t mean I can’t find it very unerotic. You two are like an old-married couple.”

“Not everyone’s sex life includes getting tied to her bedpost and shunted into the mattress with a strap-on on regular basis.” Taeyeon reminds her girlfriend as she joins them for lunch. Baekhyun’s eyes go a little wild.

“Too much information.” Junmyeon mumbles but smiles nonetheless when Taeyeon leans over to Baekhyun for a peck. Baekhyun is the first friend outside of her ex-husband’s and her circle that she found after the separation and she is glad that Taeyeon and her are happy with each other.

“Excited about picking up the pup?” Taeyeon turns to ask and allows Junmyeon to brag with her men’s excitement. Baekhyun does not annoy her about her sex life again.

For the moment.

 

 

.

 

Chocoball fast becomes the center of their world. Much to Junmyeon’s surprise Tao willingly gets up earlier every morning to take Chocoball along on their morning jogs, carrying the pup when it is exhausted. The arrangement works, even though they can no longer sleep in on Sundays and Sehun cannot walk the puppy without an adult’s company yet. What Sehun does instead is playing with Chocoball in every room of the flat, teaching the pup his first little tricks. Just as eagerly does he go to puppy school with Junmyeon who, by everyone’s vote, serves as the pup’s pack leader.

Chocoball is smart and eager, excited and curious and Junmyeon is proud of the process her pup makes. Although she has to enforce a couple of rules more than five times Chocoball accepts them as he grows and sleeps in front of the bed on her side at all times. No matter how disappointed he is that he did not escape the bi-weekly fur care treatment, Chocoball still snuggles into her lap right after, rolled up tightly into a tiny, fluffy ball.

Yifan winces when Junmyeon suggests for the first time to get him castrated, but they manage to make an agreement that when the time comes around a surgery will be performed. Junmyeon thinks it is only for Chocoball’s best if he can concentrate without his hormones going crazy. Yifan finds no room to argue after he experiences a male dogs’s behavior around a female dog in heat for the first time.

Wei Zhe is mildly offended at the threatening growl he receives whenever he picks up Tao and Sehun. Yifan immediately declares Chocoball the smartest dog in the universe. Junmyeon does only roll her eyes after turning her back on the two men. Yeeun seems to be acceptable to the tiny being however and Junmyeon briefly wonders if it has something to do with the fixation on a woman as alpha element.

 

What comes as a real surprise is the call from Yeeun, in her sixth month of pregnancy, to invite Junmyeon to her baby shower.

“Are you sure that you want me there? I will stick out like a sore thumb.” Junmyeon wonders openly and honest. The underlying competition between the two women although caused by Wei Zhe has never subsided and Junmyeon is considerate enough not to want to put the pregnant woman in an uncomfortable place in her own home.

“Junmyeon, you are the mother to my baby girl’s older brothers. One way or another you will be included in her life so I want you to come. I’m sure you have lots of recommendations and pointers for me that my friends don’t have. I’m the first mother among them and neither Wei Zhe’s nor my own mother can come so I could really use your help. Just say yes. This is the only favor I’ll ask of you.”

Junmyeon takes a deep breath. Contemplates for a moment.

Junmyeon remembers her first pregnancy vividly. Little Zitao had made her feel unwell in the morning a lot, messed up her eating habits and made her go through a magnitude of extreme emotions that made the later pregnancy with Sehun feel like a completely emotionless and nonchalant business in comparison. She had been constantly worried that something might go wrong, annoyed her doctor at any given chance about from what clothes to wear down to what to eat and read every child care counselor in Korean, Chinese and English that she could find.

She took swimming lessons for pregnant women, the necessary classes for relaxation and labor, learned to cook baby food and sew clothes, went berserk on making the household free of hard edges and forced Wei Zhe to tell her every day that he loved her and would never leave her. Hormonal and delusional in retrospective, but she had needed it back then. And Wei Zhe had meant it too, then, Junmyeon is sure of it to this day.

For Tao they had prepared the best of the best, had been the most annoying type of first-time parents in existence and if Junmyeon went back she would do it all the same.

Because Junmyeon remembers every internal and external freakout over stumbling or bumping into something with her bloated middle she does not have the heart to deny Yeeun her help. Because she remembers the deep rooted fear that she would not be a good mother to Tao and that she would hold him the wrong way and he would not develop well because of her inabilities she puts her pride and still slightly damaged heart aside. After all another young woman is going through all of those fears and worries for the first time.

“Alright. I’ll come. Is there anything you need help with setting up?”

 

 

~

 

Pregnant.

That is what the two stripes on white plastic say on all three of the tests Junmyeon bought in the pharmacy just to make absolutely sure. This… this result is crystal clear.

At thirty-five with a full-time job, two sons in elementary school and a puppy to take care of Kim Junmyeon is with child. From her supervisor slash boyfriend of thirty-six.

It is a shock, an absolute shock and the six red lines blur in front of Junmyeon’s eyes as reality settles in. This is real and insane and explains all the odd bursts of extreme understanding towards every living creature Junmyeon has felt for the past three weeks.

But this cannot be. They have only been a little reckless with protection that one time, how can a child be created so fast when it took Wei Zhe and her four and two months each to conceive her sons. Does Yifan have super sperm or…

Junmyeon does not want another child.

But this is also Yifan’s child. And Yifan will want this child. But Junmyeon has not planned for this to happen, this was never supposed to happen. Affording the abortion by herself will be a struggle if she considers doing this by herself and she owes… she owes Yifan to know about this tiny product of their love growing inside her.

Yifan is going to think she does not love him enough. He is going to leave, just like Wei Zhe when she does not bear the child he wants with her. Tao and Sehun will be so hurt when he is gone, so upset and Wei Zhe will successfully acquire custody over them and Junmyeon will be alone. Without job, without love, without her children. Because this one child is not supposed to be.

Another child does not fit into her plans, not into her life. But she is catching herself, wondering if it will be a girl this time, if she will have Yifan’s eyes and Junmyeon’s lips. Catches herself wondering how much Tao and Sehun will spoil their little baby sister, be protective of her. If Junmyeon has the child. If Junmyeon makes Yifan a father. If Junmyeon lets Wei Zhe’s arrogant value of a real family become truth.

Junmyeon does not want that. Does not want Wei Zhe or Yifan or anyone to tell her what to do. But what does she want to do?

Junmyeon is not so sure of that.

 

 

~

 

“You look like shit.” Baekhyun greets her the next day at work and Junmyeon ignores her on purpose.

She is not in the mood for anything and especially not Byun Always-Cheerful-In-The-Morning Baekhyun with her perfect girlfriend and her perfect dogs and her perfect life where she does not have to fear conceiving a child she does not want. No, Junmyeon really is not in the mood for her coworker right now.

“What’s with you Junmyeonnie?” Baekhyun prods in response to the silent treatment and Junmyeon grunts, turning her computer on.

“Not your morning?”  
“Not my life.” Junmyeon mumbles as she drops her bag rather unceremoniously under her desk.

“What was that?”  
“Nothing.” Junmyeon snaps as she hammers the password into her keyboard. “Can’t you leave me alone just once in the morning, is that too much to ask of you or are you not capable of that level of sensibility and silence in general?”

Baekhyun gives her a hurt look and turns back to her computer without a word. Junmyeon does not feel guilty at all.

Except she starts to when Baekhyun does not wait for her for lunch and sends her emails with tiny requests and questions instead of asking them personally, leaving without a word of goodbye or see you tomorrow once she is done with her work. It makes Junmyeon brood with uneasiness and displeasure. Stupid hormones, stupid pregnancy.

On her way home Junmyeon thinks about it a little more. At this rate she is going to burst from all the doubts and fears and she needs an outlet, needs someone to listen and hold her that is not involved in the situation. Baekhyun has always been her friend, has pulled her out of her shell the first few months that Junmyeon started working at Shenzai Corporation. Even if no one else does, Baekhyun understands her and does not judge her and Junmyeon should not have been so unfair towards her in the morning.

With the firm resolution that she has nothing to lose, Junmyeon changes trains but instead of commuting home, she takes the line into the opposite direction.

“I’m pregnant!”

It bursts out of Junmyeon when Baekhyun opens the door with confusion in her features and so do the tears she has not allowed herself to cry the day before, desperation and panic finally running loose. And Baekhyun, warm and gentle Baekhyun does not hesitate for one second to pull her into her arms and hold her, carefully shuffling them inside so she can close the door and give them the needed privacy.

“It’s okay, Junmyeon. It’s okay.” Baekhyun assures softly her as she wipes through the wet streams on Junmyeon’s face and maneuvers her onto the couch. A beagle pup trudges over and nuzzles its nose against Junmyeon’s ankle. Despite the situation it makes her smile. Chocoball really loves doing that too.

Baekhyun makes them each a cup of white tea before joining Junmyeon on the couch with a look of high concern and alert.

“I assume this is what your snappy behavior this morning was about.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to say these things.” Junmyeon apologizes earnestly between hiccups and Baekhyun takes her hand, stroking over the skin. It is extremely soothing.

“I know and I forgive you. But now tell me from the start. Since when do you know it? Does Yifan know? Have you two decided what to do?”

Junmyeon shakes her head and takes a deep breath before ranting out about the many thoughts on her mind, the insecurities and the uncertainties that are wrecking her like a havoc. Baekhyun listens and nods along, hands tissues and makes more tea as Junmyeon does not seem to find an ending to the vicious circle of her thoughts.

“You know this yourself, but I think you need to talk to Yifan about it. It doesn’t help that you never talked about children and marriage before, but now it cannot be avoided and I doubt that Yifan is going to leave you hanging about this, not when he has been on this road with you for such a long time.”

“The amount of time spent together means nothing when feelings change.” Junmyeon says bitterly and jerks when Baekhyun pushes her lightly.

“I know that too, but Junmyeon, you know best that Yifan is not like your ex-husband and you need to confront him about this sooner or later. He will probably just be mad that you didn’t let him know immediately, judging from how easily that pisses him off when we work on a project.”

“It may come as a surprise to you, but at home Yifan is not Mr. Wu, supervisor of Public Relations.” Junmyeon retorts.

“Of course not, but he’s still the man that made the conscious decision to love and be with a divorced woman with two kids, regardless of all complications. I can’t believe that I’m saying this, but I have that much faith in him. Talk to him.”

“But what if this destroys everything?” Junmyeon wonders quietly and stares at her hands. Baekhyun gives her a soft look, understanding swirling in it.

“Then there will be enough space for the boys and you and the pup until you found a new place to rent. As for your job, we can arrange something until either he or you found a new employer. Don’t worry, Taeyeonnie and I will be your safety net.”

“Thank you.” Junmyeon says and means it wholeheartedly.

“So… will you talk to him?” Baekhyun prods.

“Yeah, I will.”

 

-

 

Dinner table is set when Junmyeon arrives home at seven. Chocoball trails behind her happily and needs a lot convincing to lie down in his basket, but he gives in obediently then.

“Where have you been? I could swear you left the office before me.” Yifan asks between a few pecks. Junmyeon stiffens slightly at the question but wills herself to calm down.

“Baekhyun and I spontaneously had tea after work and it got later than I thought.”

It is not a lie.

“Is everything okay? You have been a little odd since yesterday.” Yifan wonders quietly so Tao and Sehun cannot hear the concern swinging in his voice.

It makes Junmyeon stomach churn how attuned to her moods he is and she resents herself a little for the knowledge she will burden him with.

“I’ll tell you about it later, alright?” Junmyeon promises and rests her head over his heart for a moment before stepping out of his embrace. She hopes it is not the last time she gets to do that.

“Alright.” Yifan responds with a minor nod and sits down.

Dinner passes by as usual for the most part. Tao chatters about school, about his friends and that he has done all his homework already so _can I please play two hours on the playstation today, please Mommy_ and Yifan talks about the executive meeting they had. Only Sehun stays quiet, uncharacteristically quiet for his already rather withdrawn self and Junmyeon observes him with worry.

“How was your school day, Sehun?”

“As usual. Math was stupid, Art was fun.” Sehun shrugs and spoons rice into his mouth.

“Any homework?”

“Five problems in Math we have to solve. I already did two.” Sehun mumbles around the white grains. Junmyeon ruffles his hair affectionately.

“If you have any troubles call for my help, alright?”

“Yes, Mom.”

He does not call, but that does not stop Junmyeon from entering his room before bedtime to check up on him. Sehun lies in bed and just stares at the ceiling, something Junmyeon knows he only does when he does not know what to do with his feelings. So this is serious.

“What’s wrong, Sehunnie?” Junmyeon asks carefully and sits down on the side of his bed. Sehun keeps staring up. Maybe it’s not the right time now, Junmyeon figures and makes to get up again when tiny, slender fingers hold onto her wrist and tug. She allows her youngest, _officially_ youngest, to pull her to his side on the bed. Junmyeon combs through his hair with her fingers while he snuggles closer into her body. She indulges him for a while and hopes he is going to tell her by himself what bothers him so much.

“Mom?”

“Yes, Sehun?”

“You love me, right?”

“Of course I do.” Junmyeon assures him firmly.

“Even when I am a fag?”

This startles Junmyeon. For one did she never expect her sons to even use such insulting words and especially not at that age, for another she has absolutely no idea what this was prompted by.

“Do you even know what that word means, Sehun?”

“It’s when two boys hold hands and kiss each other. And that is a bad thing.”

“Says who?” Junmyeon interrogates, anger rising slowly inside of her.

“Yoojin’s Dad. Yoojin says he said it is disgusting when boys like each other like that. I don’t want to be disgusting, Mom.” Sehun says earnestly and shrinks into himself.

It breaks Junmyeon’s heart to see him that way. But it is a fact still that not only heteronormativity reigns, many people still are offensively bigoted about other people’s love life in general too. Junmyeon has always tried to raise Tao and Sehun with acceptance of homosexuality as one part in the huge spectrum of sexual orientations and hopes she gives them the feeling they can explore who they like free from social norms. It seems she is in the minority with that attitude and upbringing.

“You’re not disgusting Sehun, not to me and not to Tao and not to Yifan either. It is okay to want to kiss a boy and hold hands with him. We will not love you any less for it.”

Junmyeon pecks Sehun who relaxes a little, fists slowly loosening from the tight ball he has curled them into. But there still seems to be something heavy on his heart.

“Jun’s Dad forbids him to hold hands and kiss me anymore and Jun says his Dad will contact you if we keep doing it. Now he won’t even look at me.” Sehun babbles and there are tears brimming in his eyes. Junmyeon had sincerely thought she had another six or seven years until his first heartbreak.

“Next time tell Jun that his father should definitely call me.” Junmyeon demands fiery “I will let him know what I think about him telling my son what he can or cannot do.”

Sehun huffs at that despite the single tear running over the bridge of his nose.

“You know that I love you, right Mommy?”

“I love you too, baby. There are adults and children that will give you a hard time, because they don’t understand it. But that is not your fault and I don’t want you to blame yourself for their attitude, okay?”

“Okay.” Sehun breathes and allows her to cuddle him a little before he speaks up again.

“Can you sleep here tonight?”

“I’ll have to stay with Sehun.” Junmyeon informs Yifan as she enters the bedroom shortly after promising not to leave him alone for the night.

“Did something happen?” Yifan worries, peering at her over the brink of his glasses as he lowers his book.

“From what I’ve gathered his classmates bully him and another boy for liking each other. Can you believe it?” Junmyeon exclaims as she pulls her nightgown on “Homophobic elementary school students. Sehun’s all heartbroken, because the boy’s father ordered him to stay away and he worries we hate him too.”

Yifan scowls and moves to get up from their bed, swinging his legs over the side to sit up.

“It’s incredible how cruel this world is on a eight year-old boy. Are you sure we should not let him sleep here with us?”

Junmyeon shakes her hand and walks over to kiss him softly.

“I think tonight it’s for the best when it’s just me. I’ll ask Yixing to talk to him about this next time we have him over for babysitting. He can relate to Sehun better than you and I ever will.”

“True.” Yifan agrees and hugs her waist, resting his head against her stomach for a moment.

It makes Junmyeon’s heart jolt because Yifan still does not know, is unaware that his head is mere centimeters away from his own first child. Possible first child. They _did_ want to talk tonight.

“I presume we will speak about the other thing tomorrow? I feel like Sehun’s the priority here.”

Junmyeon nods mutely and pecks him one last time before returning to Sehun.

 

 

~

 

“I can see by the tip of your nose that you didn’t speak to Yifan.” Baekhyun states as she enters the office at nine. Junmyeon ducks behind her monitors to avoid the whack coming her way.

“Something came up.” She explains.

“What can be so important that you delay a heart to heart with your boyfriend, father of your possibly third child?”

“A heart to heart with my son, that’s what happened.”

“Oh.” Baekhyun replies dumbly and blinks.

Junmyeon proceeds to tell her what Sehun confessed to her the night before, because Baekhyun knows this pain, has lived through this pain herself.

“It is apparently still fashionable to raise your kids as homophobic little monsters.” Junmyeon concludes with a gloomy look. She is still angry and feels helpless to improving the situation for Sehun. It is not a nice feeling at all.

“If you want I can talk to him about this. As expert in everything gay, you know?” Baekhyun offers with a laugh that Junmyeon identifies as a little strained.

Over the time of working together Junmyeon has learned a lot about Baekhyun and there is no question as to why Baekhyun’s parents threw her out of the house once she became of age. There is a façade to Baekhyun, cheery, playful and loud, that only few people manage to look behind and Junmyeon worries and wonders if things will be the same for Sehun who is a shy, withdrawn character.

“If you like.”

“If I can help someone to feel a little less lost about not loving like the boringly heteronormal rest of humanity then I gladly do.”

“Baekhyun…” Junmyeon starts, a warning that Baekhyun returns with a cheeky grin.

“And you will talk to Yifan tonight for real, are we clear?”

“Yes yes.” Junmyeon promises and tries to ignore the anxiety rising up inside her.

 

 

~

 

The words make Junmyeon stop typing a reply e-mail mid-sentence.

“Sehun told me you threw up this morning.”

She braces herself before turning around in her chair and looking at Yifan. He is suspecting, she can see that in the firm and undistracted look he spares her with. But then the look changes to something unsure and careful.

“Don’t get upset over me assuming this, alright, but it kind of makes sense to me so I’ll just ask it. Are you… pregnant, Junmyeon?”

There is no escape this time.

“Yes.” Junmyeon answers shakily and feels her heart beat speeding up, slamming merciless in her chest and she tries to get as much air as possible without breaking apart.

“I took three tests, two days ago and the result is positive on all of them.”

“Two days ago.” Yifan repeats monotonously and this is not the reaction Junmyeon expected. Joy, painful euphoria and excitement were what she predicted, not the almost complete lack of emotion, not this front he pulls up.

“And you didn’t think I need to know about this? _I_ had to come to you and ask?”

“I can explain!” Junmyeon starts defensively, desperately.

“Well, explain.” Yifan demands and crosses his arms in front of his chest. It makes Junmyeon extremely uncomfortable.

“I have to sort my thoughts. This is extremely overwhelming.”

“In which sense? Have I ever made you feel like I don’t want to hear about your thoughts?”

“No, but. After Sehun’s birth I made the decision that two children are enough and Wei Zhe cited this as one of the reasons why he wanted the divorce, you know, that I didn’t want to play human breeding system for him. I always thought if I get pregnant again then I would abort the child, because I might not love it as it deserves to be loved.”

“Judging by how much you dote on your sons I can hardly imagine that.” Yifan scoffs, face melting into a mix of disbelief and offense. Junmyeon starts to flail.

“See, I knew it would be like this! That you would not understand this.”

“I partook in making this child too, just in case you forgot. My opinion on this matters too, but you haven’t even deemed it important to include me in any of this at all.” Yifan accused her.

“Well the verdict is pretty clear, isn’t it? You will want this child with me and if I abort it then you will probably really leave me and the boys and I’ll have to leave my job and Wei Zhe finally has the ultimate chance to get custody over them because he’ll declare that with my abortion I am clearly not mentally capable of motherhood after all and I’ll frequent Baekhyun’s couch until she throws me out too. Doesn’t that sound like a wonderful plan?” Junmyeon rants, tears starting to spill over as she thinks about Yifan leaving, Tao and Sehun getting taken away from her.

Through clouded eyes Junmyeon can see how the scowl on Yifan’s face deepens as he looks back at her. It makes her cry harder, fear stronger and hope desperately.

“You know what makes me the most upset about this?” Yifan spits after a minute “That you still don’t seem to trust me at all. I really don’t know what else to do at this point to convince you of how honest my feelings and decisions are without you doubting them from back to front.”

“I do trust you!” Junmyeon protests vehemently.

“No, you don’t.” Yifan’s tone is absolute. “And you doubt everything. You just said so yourself, you wonder if I will leave you as if I hadn’t made absolutely clear with every commitment more that I take upon that I go nowhere where you aren’t. I moved together with you, I often wish your sons were my own flesh and blood and I have arranged my whole life around this family, because I want it to be mine. Why do you take the right to decide what I want and don’t, what I do or don’t? I’m your partner, Junmyeon, not your son or anyone else.”

“But you still-” Junmyeon sobs but Yifan shakes his head.

“My issue is not whether or not you want to abort our child and what I think about it, my issue is that nothing I have done for you seems to have any effect on your level of trust and that hurts more than you can imagine. That the woman I love seems convinced I can easily turn around and go if I am not pleased with her. That the woman I love seems to believe my feelings can so easily be altered, that there’s not depth to them.”

There is nothing but silence for a while. Junmyeon tries to dry her eyes with the sleeves of her sweater, but the tears keep pouring. This is going wrong, horribly wrong in every way possible. She lost control over her thoughts, nerves, feelings. She does not know how to pick herself up, put herself back together and face Yifan strongly, bravely. Yifan’s body language speaks of the same to her.

“I don’t think we can discuss this like adults tonight. I’ll sleep on the couch.” Yifan decides eventually and grabs his set of pillow and blanket.

Junmyeon lets him go, wondering if quite possibly she has destroyed the second best thing ever happened to her.

 

 

The bed is dipping in the middle of the night, tearing Junmyeon out of a restless sleep. A lean, long body stretches out next to her, familiar arm draping across her waist and pulling her into comforting warmth.

“Junmyeon” Yifan whispers and although she cried enough for a lifetime this night the tears are coming back and the sob she lets is loud, echoing through the bedroom. Yifan’s arm tightens around her waist and she turns around in his embrace, pressing frantic, wet kisses to his jaw.

“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” She says all over, relieved that he took the first step, soothed to have him by her side again. Without Yifan sleeping has become troublesome.

“I’m sorry too.” He replies softly and she may not see him in the dark, but she can hear how deeply he inhales her scent and feel his tense muscles relax.

“I can’t sleep without you.” Yifan confesses and they settle deeper into the mattress, Junmyeon on her back with Yifan’s head on her chest.

“I didn’t mean to make you feel like I doubt you. I still have a hard time believing that I have all of this, all this happiness and that there’s no guarantee that this won’t slip through my fingers again is driving me insane. That’s not your fault and I promise I’ll work on it and on letting you in on my thoughts more.”

“Fine, and in return I will accept that you struggle with this and not pressure you about it. I’ll also be more communicative and open about which direction I want us to go so such a situation doesn’t occur another time.” Yifan promises and splays one of his hands on Junmyeon’s stomach. It makes Junmyeon calm down significantly.

“What will we do about the little dweeb inside here?” He asks carefully.

“Since I just assumed but never asked, why don’t you tell me what you think?” Junmyeon offers and wills her nerves to calm down.

“You assumed right though, I want this child very much.”

Junmyeon’s heart stops.

“But not if it costs me my girlfriend and the children she already has. You never said anything regarding the matter and I didn’t want to push you about hoping you’d love to raise a child with me that we both made after Yeeun announced her pregnancy and you reacted so resolute about it. All in all I am just as responsible for this child as you are, so whatever you decide to do and when you decide, you can be sure of my support no matter what that decision is. I won’t love you less for not wanting to shoulder the difficult task of raising another child.”

“Did you know that I love you?” Junmyeon asks into the darkness and smiles as Yifan gives a small kiss to her collarbones. 

“I had an inkling.”

 

 

~

 

Junmyeon does not make a decision yet. With Yifan consenting she probably should go straight ahead, but Junmyeon is still not sure at all which choice to make. It remains fact there is life growing inside of her and her hormones make her very mushy and emotional, contemplating the options she has and which one will cause the greater regret. It feels nice to be pregnant again, a feeling Junmyeon almost forgot she enjoys, but the rational side of her knows this is hormones’ work and she needs to make a firm and logical decision in the end.

Yeeun’s baby shower is a welcome distraction of sort in the midst of confusion and uncertainty. Junmyeon hates to admit it, but it is a lot of fun to organize a few things with Yeeun’s friends behind the soon-to-be mother’s back. It only takes a little nudging for Wei Zhe to drop all the information she needs and when the big Saturday afternoon comes around Junmyeon finds to her surprise that she really looks forward to it.

“You are insane!” Yeeun exclaims at the cheesecake Junmyeon spent most of her Friday evening on. It is a dream of berries and cream on dark chocolate pastry and Junmyeon even wrote “Congratulations Yeeun and Wei Zhe” in purple sugar icing on top. It comes in handy to have spent part of her life between Tao’s birth and the divorce crafting her baking skills.

Yeeun’s eyes threaten to fall out at the decorations her friends set up under Junmyeon’s instructions and the gift table, which is entirely overloaded. It is extremely gratifying and Junmyeon knows right then no matter how the afternoon runs they made Yeeun very happy.

It is a pleasant evening. Junmyeon shares stories about her pregnancies, Yeeun’s friends either amused or horrified at it while Yeeun herself spends a lot time laughing at the accuracy. Junmyeon is surprised by herself how she relaxes so well between the young women who are younger than her by around a decade.

“The hormones are the worst, really.” Yeeun moans in a light complaint. “You’d think with a life growing inside you your hormones will mostly focus on keeping you happy and hungry, but no, that’s not everything.”

“I know, they also make you extremely keen on making at least fifteen more babies _during_ the pregnancy.” Junmyeon comments dryly, because Yifan looks even more enticing in a suit lately than he already does and she remembers how constantly riled up she was during her first two pregnancies.

Yeeun’s friends look at them mildly scandalized while Yeeun laughs herself to tears and Junmyeon cannot calm her own giggles.

“Just wait until you’re experiencing this yourself one day.”

Around the early evening Yeeun’s friends part one by one until it is only Junmyeon and the young mother-to-be. They had assured the other women several times that they would be fine cleaning up with two pairs of hands, but once they close the door behind the last one Junmyeon orders Yeeun to sit on the couch. She ignores the slight sting of memories that she once was the lady of this house, not the other and knows her way around with closed eyes. It does not matter. Things have changed and it is no use to mourn what is lost when life gave her something so good, so precious as a man with a kind heart and almost endless understanding for her insecurities and attitudes.

“I’d love to keep the decorations, I really like them.”

“Sure.” Junmyeon replies as she puts the last plates into the dishwasher.

“Would you like some tea?”

“God yes, I’m exhausted and someone’s kicking me like they want to be a Martial Arts artist in the future.”

Junmyeon still smiles when she joins Yeeun on the couch, the other opening her eyes and slowly sitting up as she accepts the cup Junmyeon hands her.

“Thank you.”

“You’re welcome.” Junmyeon replies and sinks into the couch.

“No, sincerely thank you. I asked a lot of you, organizing this in the house you held your own two baby showers in for the woman your husband divorced you for. It must have been a great effort to swallow your pride for this and I have been feeling really guilty for being so insensitive and forcing this on you.” Yeeun sighs and takes a sip from her tea.

Junmyeon is honestly a little stunned. Yeeun and her have a cool-friendly relationship at best and she has not expected the other to be this considerate after all.

“It was fun, honestly, so don’t sweat it. I might be your husband’s first wife, but I am foremost a mother and as that I solidarize. This is your first pregnancy and I remember how insane my first felt to me. You can ask Wei Zhe, I think I drove him insane too during those nine, ten months.” Junmyeon chuckles at the memory. Wei Zhe is still sore about that particular piece of China and does she regret throwing it? No.

“Not sure if this pregnancy makes me extra mellow, but I’ve been thinking for a while that I should apologize to you. Not for falling in love with Wei Zhe, because that’s something I don’t feel the slightest bit of remorse for, but for the way you split up. I was pushing him to do it and I honestly just wanted you out of my way, so he was probably more radical than he intended to.”

“It was harsh, yes.” Junmyeon informs her unveiled, because they seem to have the confrontation they never had right now and although too much stress is not good for Yeeun in her state, there are things not meant to stay unsaid.

“But looking back now our marriage wasn’t in the best shape either way. There were terribly dry routines and we both lacked sexual desire for the other at the point where you stepped in. We didn’t really talk like equals, he made decisions I was upset with and we fought a lot when Tao and Sehun couldn’t see and hear it. I think we had both given up on loving each other, but I at least wanted to keep the ship sailing until the boys were grown up enough to understand and I felt comfortable in our routine. I thought he felt the same way and he probably did until you met. Doesn’t mean the treatment he gave me didn’t hurt, didn’t leave scars. Those are on him, not on you, but I accept your apology. I didn’t make it exactly easy for Wei Zhe either once I received the divorce papers, but I had to fight for my boys.”

They look at each other. Junmyeon can see the relief in Yeeun’s features and exhales softly. Perhaps it is the right time now, two pregnant women making peace over the past. Yeeun caresses her round belly gently and speaks up again.

“Becoming a mother now and having no job for the time after birth I realize how hard it must have been on you. The panic about supporting the boys and yourself out of the blue, the fight over custody… I wouldn’t want anyone to put me through that and yet I did that to you. I know you don’t like me and to a degree I probably deserve that, but I’m trying to make amends and be a better person for my child. Part of that is giving it a chance to grow up with its step-siblings without constant conflicts and fights between the parents. You were always very insistent on that and I’m getting it now, so I’m suggesting a truce.”

“Accepted.” Junmyeon agrees immediately.

“So easily?” Yeeun wonders.

“So easily. We’re both adults enough to know it is a better arrangement for both our families if we’re actually trying to get along.”

“True. I hope that includes that I can message you up when I feel odd during the pregnancy or panic about taking care of this baby girl correctly.”

“Well, you will probably be scared a lot about the amount of vomiting although it’s fairly normal and just means the body functions properly. I bought an army of burp cloths for Sehun, because he always drank too much too eagerly and it all went backwards. You wouldn’t believe that with all the chub in his face these days, but I was constantly buried in burped up milk. And Tao wanted to be carried around for years even though he could walk by himself after fourteen months, so I had to get physical therapy for my back regularly.”

“Sounds exhausting. Oh God, what did I get myself into?” Yeeun exclaims and shakes her head. Junmyeon pats her thigh in sympathy.

“Don’t worry too much. Any discomfort is worth the love you receive in return. The first two, three years might seem the hardest, but the saying “Small children, small problems - big children, big problems.” is as true as it can be. Your love grows as your child grows, you’ll see that. It’s one of the reasons why I wanted another child after Tao and I don’t regret it. Not one bit. If you put me back in time I would do it all again: the vomit, the shitting, the irregular sleep pattern and the back pain, the runny noses, torn pants and bloody bruises, the whining, kicking, screaming and the bed sheets I had to change, because Sehun’s bladder has always been a little critical.”

“Motherhood is for life regardless of what happens, huh?” Yeeun concludes with a fond smile at her round middle.

“It is.” Junmyeon agrees and sincerely wishes Yeeun to make the great experience herself smoothly.

 

.

 

The boys are sitting on the couch in their pajamas, watching their good night cartoon when Junmyeon comes home. Yifan exits the bathroom just as she passes by and jumps, pulling her against his chest.

“Welcome home, o’ bravest woman of all.”

“Nerd.” Junmyeon huffs and turns around to kiss his lips.

“Did the boys brush their teeth yet?”

“Of course.” Yifan assures her “I was hoping you’d have a glass of wine with me later so I didn’t brush mine.”

“Nope, sorry.” Junmyeon denies him and laughs at the disappointed look on his face.

“No alcohol during pregnancy, remember?”

“...right.” Yifan groans at the realization and makes evident that this is his first time being father of an unborn child.

“I could swear we have canned pineapple somewhere, I think I’ll eat that and you’ll have your wine, deal?” Junmyeon suggests.

“Deal.”

“How bad was it really?” Yifan asks while Junmyeon chews lightly on a pineapple ring, delighting in the flavors melting on her tongue.

“Not bad at all. I successfully prepared them to think several times before getting into the baby-making business and Yeeun and I talked a little. From adult to adult, you know?”

She grabs another ring and bites a piece out.

“She apologized to me for pushing Wei Zhe about the divorce. Actually we have made a truce for the sake of the children to seriously try and be nicer to each other.”

“Glad to hear that.” Yifan replies and takes a sip from his wine, watching her as she makes a grab for the next pineapple ring.

“Is there a free afternoon slot in your schedule next week by the way?” Junmyeon wonders.

“Thursday, why?”

“I made my decision regarding our dweeb and I hope you could drive me to the hospital for all necessary paperwork, the checkup and hold my hand. I don’t want to do this all by myself.”

“Of course you won’t.” Yifan assures her and takes her hand over the table.

There’s pineapple juice on it, sticky and sweet, but he does not even wince. She knows he is trying to convince her that he will always be there.

“Do you intend to eat that whole can or can I have a piece too?”

“Yes and no, you can’t!” Junmyeon hums and pulls the can out of his reach with a grin.

 

 

~

 

“I can’t see _anything_.” Yifan admits with squinted eyes as he peers at the display, trying to make out shapes.

“Are you sure you put in your contacts today? I can see everything pretty well.” Junmyeon snorts and shakes her head.

“I’ll show you, Sir.” The gynecologist interjects and starts drawing tiny circles on black and white. “Here’s the head and eyes, there the tiny feet. The embryo is only a few weeks old so there is only this much to see. By the next checkup there will be more details.”

Yifan nods in understanding, but Junmyeon can tell that his whole body language is screaming excitement over seeing his first child on the ultrasound for the first time. It is precious and makes her feel warm, happy and a little bit sheltered too.

He listens attentively to everything the doctor explains about pregnancy risks in general, what Yifan can do as her partner and father of the child to be of the best support and Junmyeon allows him to unload an army of questions on the specialist although she could answer a lot of them from experience and checkups of her last two pregnancies. It has been a decade since she conceived Tao and yet everything is fresh on her mind again.

Junmyeon will have this baby.

Yes, it is a lot of work to have another child, especially when Tao and Sehun will be going through puberty when their two step-siblings are their current age. But Junmyeon looks forward to it, looks forward to guiding another precious child from birth to adulthood and she knows Yifan will be there, will be the best possible father for his child and the best possible stepfather to her two boys. This child is a commitment they are both willing to make with the greatest amount of love, although Junmyeon is displeased that she plays into Wei Zhe’s traditional family values after all.

“Can we have several copies of the ultrasound?”

“Yifan!”

“I want to send one to my mother and put one up in the office. Your parents will want one and then we should have one for us.” Yifan explains unshaken and looks at the doctor pleadingly.

“That’s no problem, you can have as many copies as you want.”

“You’re impossible.” Junmyeon states, because she knows that he wants to brag in the office and everywhere else, but it also makes her feel loved and appreciated. She will never tell him that, however.

 

.

 

When Junmyeon visits Yeeun later to help picking out a good hospital for the day of birth, the ultrasound pictures come in handy. She thinks it might be necessary to let Yeeun know she is not the only pregnant lady in their newly found semi-friendship. They discuss the different options, among them the hospital Junmyeon had her checkup in.

“I delivered Sehun in that hospital. The gynecology is one of the best in the city and the staff is competent, doctors and nurses alike. They have several options of labor methods including water birth and C-section so you’d be in good hands. I went there with Yifan today actually. There’s something I have to show you, hold up.”

“Show me?” Yeeun repeats and looks up from the leaflets of Seoul’s different hospitals.

Junmyeon digs around in her bag until she finds the photobag. She hates to admit that her hands are shaking a little as you pulls out the ultrasound picture and places it on the table in front of Yeeun.

Who then gasps dramatically.

“Junmyeon! Seriously?”

“Seriously. This is completely unplanned and I’m still progressing that this will throw my life around again, but Yifan is so excited about it that I guess there’s nothing to worry about.”

“That’s such great news! Hey, Wei Zhe, come here for a second.” Yeeun yells loud enough that Junmyeon jerks slightly in her seat and then she hears the familiar heavy stomping of her ex-husband in the hallway.

“Hello Junmyeon.” He greets her monotonously and Junmyeon cannot help thinking that he has put on weight. At almost forty his hair seems to decrease, scalp shining through under thin hair and he wears ridiculously fashionable clothes, probably an attempt to appear younger.

It hits Junmyeon with a clarity she did not know she possessed that she no longer feels even a trace of attraction towards him, everything that once made her love him erased by time. Or perhaps it is because Yifan ages so well in comparison. Every of his wrinkles make him sexier in her eyes, like an everyday George Clooney. The young female assistants in their company are still upset that she fetched him before they could.

“What is it?” Wei Zhe asks Yeeun softly and Junmyeon has to hand it to him, he really loves his second wife. Yeeun hands him the ultrasound of the little dweeb, as Junmyeon allowed Yifan to call the baby for now, and grins.

“This patchwork keeps growing.”

It is comical to watch the wheels in her ex-husband’s heads turning, the confusion in his eyes making way for shock, disbelief and, but Junmyeon can be imagining this, a hint of disappointment and resentment. Their eyes meet and Wei Zhe swallows hard before directing his words at her.

“But you never wanted a third child.”

“That’s true and I seriously considered not having it at all for reasons you can very well imagine. I don’t like calling this an accident, but in a way it is and I’m responsible for damage control.”

“But? What does Yifan say about this?” He prods and Junmyeon raises her eyebrows at the accusing tone and crosses her arms in front of her chest in defense.

“Yifan is man enough to understand that I had a lot to contemplate and he respected my decision as the most important when it came to this. And I made the decision for having the child.”

“Just like that?” Wei Zhe wonders in disbelief and Junmyeon tries not to snap at him in his own house.

“No, of course not _just like that_ , what do you think? I don’t know about this since yesterday, I had time to think this through and although I am definitely not the type of woman with a huge primal urge to reproduce like a maniac I feel love for this child and I see myself raising it with Yifan. Who is by the way really looking forward to it, if that’s what you’re so concerned about.”

Wei Zhe gives her a long look. They both know this was always a big issue and caused them both a great deal of pain, played a huge factor in the love that died between them. But Junmyeon believes if Wei Zhe reserves the right to have the army of children he wants with another woman then Junmyeon also reserves the right to change her mind and have a child with her new partner. Life is bitter-sweet like that and the faster Wei Zhe accepts that he no longer has a hold on her, the better for not only Junmyeon but also Yeeun. She does not think it is fair on the other when Wei Zhe keeps acting possessive over the long gone past.

“Congratulations then. I guess that means we really will have to communicate more about the upbringing of our children, huh?” Wei Zhe reluctantly says and Junmyeon smiles at him.

“We do, but I’m positive about this.”

After Wei Zhe bids his goodbye Yeeun has her telling from back to front about the last weeks, about all fears and insecurities and it feels nice to have Yeeun understand her motives.

“Wait, but then you were pregnant at the babyshower already. Why didn’t you tell me?”

“Because I wasn’t sure until that point whether or not to abort or have the dweeb.”

“Dweeb.” Yeeun giggles delighted “We call our baby ‘the glob’.”

“Dweeb and Glob. I can already see them turning the world upside down.” Junmyeon laughs and presses a hand to her flabby stomach. She hopes her dweeb will not go on missions alike its older brothers.

“It would be nice if those two could grow up together like siblings.” Yeeun expresses thoughtfully and Junmyeon nods. Indeed, it would.

 

 

~

 

EPILOGUE

Eunbyul loses her fifth tooth on Sehun’s fifteenth birthday. Yubi, always easily wired into the younger one’s business, gives both her mother and Junmyeon a splitting headache over the determination with which she tries to loosen a tooth as act of solidarity.

“For the last time Yubi, your teeth will fall out when they fall out. You cannot force them to.” Yeeun scolds while she wrestles with Kangjun to stop him from kicking her belly. Sibling number three is on its way and Yixing, ever reliant family babysitter, steps in to take the boy from Yeeun’s arms before damage can be done, carrying the boy to the living room.

“Come on big boy, do you want Ge to play cars with you?”

Yubi, one hand clutched with Eunbyul’s, pouts in protest and looks away from her mother. There is a frown in her features that is so alike young Sehun Junmyeon has to doubletake. Meanwhile Eunbyul happily drops her tooth into Junmyeon’s palm and smiles proudly.

“The tooth fairy is going to visit tonight, right?”

“Of course.” Junmyeon promises and mentally goes through the candy drawer for something that does not melt under her daughter’s head during the night.

“Do you promise me not to loosen your teeth on purpose?” Yeeun pushes and Yubi frowns harder, but gives in.

“Yes Mom.”

“Good, go back to playing with your brothers then.”

“Let’s go and put makeup on Donghae Oppa!” Eunbyul suggests eagerly and pulls Yubi out of the kitchen.

There comes a groan from the kitchen counter, Tao carefully slicing up Sehun’s birthday cake with the knife Junmyeon keeps on the highest shelf because Yubi and Eunbyul love to explore _everything_.

“They love him more than me or Sehun, how is this fair?”

“You can’t buy a girl’s love with princess dresses and bags.” Yeeun notes teasingly.

Tao glares.

“But you can buy their attention and you can turn that attention into being favored. Why can’t I be the favorite big brother, I’ve been here first!”

“Don’t be so irrational.” Junmyeon demands just as Sehun leans against the kitchen door.

“Quit whining Peach, they simply love me more than you.”

“Hard to believe when you’re the one with the resting bitch face.”

“Can you not?” Junmyeon hisses and shoots a glare at both of them “We’re here to celebrate, please be nice to each other.”

The boys snort, but Tao hands Sehun the cake plate once he is done without more dabs at him.

“Thanks, Peach.”

Yifan uses that moment to appear behind Sehun and get a good grip on his neck. The birthday boy immediately coils into himself and takes a step back.

“I’ll behave, I’ll behave.”

“Good, then bring your cake to the table.”

“Yes, Sir.” Sehun jokes and ducks away from Yifan’s hand, ready to destroy his perfect hair style.

“They still love Donghae the most. Why is that guy here all the time anyway?” Tao continues complaining.

Donghae is Sehun’s three years older friend from the dance studio. Sehun introduced him as ‘a’ friend, but Junmyeon is sure that Donghae is more than that. Sehun never really brought someone home before, always going to his friends instead so there is something special about Donghae. Junmyeon is not exactly fond of how much older Dongdae is should they be dating, but until Sehun does not admit it to her or she finds evidence her hands are tied.

“Please stop complaining Tao, I already have a headache. Wei Zhe still isn’t here either. Not that it’s the first time he’s late lately.” Yeeun says distressed and just a slightly bit bitter. Tao hums and steps close to hug her against his chest.

“Sorry Yeeunnie, I’ll stop. As for Dad being an idiot, I guess I can talk to him some other time, alright? He can’t leave you alone with the kids all the time.”

“You don’t have to.” Yeeun tells him but Tao shakes his head and shortly places a palm on his stepmother’s round middle.

“But I want to. He wants a big family, so if he doesn’t take good care of it then he has to accept his eldest child calling him out on it, period.”

Junmyeon listens to him with swelling pride. Tao has grown so well, a sense of responsibility for all his siblings deeply infested. Although her eldest still is a very emotional person he has developed the ability of a reasonable and rational approach with the right amount of guiding by Junmyeon and Yifan alike. Every once in a while Junmyeon still has to deviate his impulsiveness and ‘act first, think later’ attitude into settling down and considering the situation first, but they went a long way from there and she has other things to worry about. Ever the son with high affinity to sports he is training to become a professional in Martial Arts and Junmyeon knows it will be hard to change his mindset about it, so instead she hopes he considers studying a profession and has a solid job to fall back to if he gets injured and can no longer follow his dream.

“I can hear you thinking about me.” Tao says next to her ear, making her jump “Your whole face just went from proud mother hen to worried helicopter mom. Stop doing that.”

“I didn’t do anything.” Junmyeon protests weakly.

“Is she doing the alpha mom face again?” Sehun wonders as he returns, Donghae trailing behind. There is smudged lipstick on Sehun’s upper lip and Donghae is fully decked in makeup, courtesy of Yubi and Eunbyul. Junmyeon so is onto them.

“Totally.” Tao validates and Sehun steps closer to him, both towering over their mother significantly. Judging by the speed at which Eunbyul is growing, Junmyeon can very well be sure that she will dwarf her whole offspring in a few years’ time. It is not consoling, but that is what you get for giving your only daughter half of Wu Yifan’s gene pool.

“Stop ganging up on me or...” Junmyeon threatens and pokes their stomachs playfully. Sehun manages to jump out of the way, but Tao shrieks and then Junmyeon is squirming under her sons’ merciless tickle attack.

“I said” she pants between giggles “stop ganging up on me.”

“Oooooh, I’m scared. How about you Tao?”

“Me too, me too.”

“And here I thought the playground is in our living room with the youngsters, but I guess I was wrong.” Yifan comments and raises an eyebrow at his family.

Junmyeon uses the moment to hide between Yeeun and catch her breath.

“Help me. Take those monsters away from me.” Junmyeon pleads with a pout.

“Actually I came because Chocoball is trying to unpack Sehun’s gifts, but if you insist.”

“What?” Sehun screams horrified and heads out. Donghae is about to follow, but Junmyeon holds him back as everyone proceeds to make their way to the living room.

“Could you stay behind for a moment?”

“As you know any friend of Sehun’s is a welcome guest in our house any time, Donghae. But I’m a mother and I’m not blind.”

The young man shrinks slightly under her gaze, so Junmyeon continues with a less stern tone.

“He isn’t telling me, but I can see it and I am by no means against my son dating as long as he makes sure his marks don’t get significantly bad and he’s home on time. I just don’t want him to get hurt.”

Donghae swallows hard and the answer only comes reluctantly.

“I understand that you’re worried about the age difference and I assure you that I don’t intend to hurt him. I think he’s more mature than you probably give him credit for. He’s thinking a lot about his future already. There… there was a talent scout in our dance studio and they want to train him, a really big entertainment company. Sehun told me he is interested but it is an unsafe job and being gay there is no way he will ever be able to freely live and love how he wants, so he declined.”

“I didn’t know that.” Junmyeon says flabbergasted, because Sehun might not tell her everything, but he usually tells her a lot after all. She would know about this.

Donghae shrugs.

“I think he didn’t want you to worry for nothing. Always says that you need to be protected from commotion, because you had plenty of it in your life.”

And perhaps Sehun has consciously caught more of the divorce and the first weeks of pregnancy with Eunbyul than he should have.

“I…” Junmyeon starts, but she really does not know what to say. Donghae smiles softly before continuing.

“I’m not supposed to tell you, but there’s something. He has participated in choreographing a lot of our dances lately, so he’s thinking about becoming a dance teacher. Our studio has a program that he really fits into and although he’s only fifteen he seriously considers it for after high school. The job is solid and pays more than decently if you go to university. Don’t tell him I told you though. An upset boyfriend is no fun to deal with.” Donghae says sheepishly and Junmyeon decides to give him a chance.

“I won’t. If you help me getting the misconception that I’m a breakable doll out of his head.”

“I can only promise to try.”

“That’s good enough. I’ll spare you the whole parental protection talk and drop that on Sehun himself another day. Can you bring that plate of cupcakes to the living room?”

Yifan and Yeeun pop up mere minutes after Junmyeon sent Donghae to go spoiling his boyfriend.

“Stamp of approval?” Yifan wonders and Junmyeon nods.

“Perhaps he should start sleeping on the couch though.” Yifan suggests, much to Junmyeon’s amusement.

“Yifan, if those two wanted to get intimate they probably already did. No one can get pregnant and we gave them the talk properly over the years. I trust Sehun to not act completely reckless.”

“If you say so, Ma’am.” Yifan salutes and Junmyeon shakes her head before kissing him gently.

“Stop making me jealous. How are you still acting like you’re a wild bunch of hormones on the run when you’re past your thirties.” Yeeun sighs.

“It’s because he’s so _hot_. He makes me feel like homecoming queen although he’s such a bad boy.” Junmyeon aspirates exaggerated with a massive grin and clutches to Yifan’s chest. Yifan snorts very unattractively at that and pinches her playfully.

“I wish Wei Zhe would act around me that way again.” Yeeun sighs again, thoughtful. Junmyeon reaches out to hold her hand, rubbing the skin softly.

“If you ever need a place to go with the kids, you know we’re here for you.”

“Thank you.” Yeeun says “but I really hope it never comes to that.”

“Me neither, but just in case Yifan has practice handling that man’s wives.” Junmyeon chimes, earning another pinch from Yifan. Yeeun shakes her head at them, but there is a smile on her face.

“But you’re the only one I want.” Yifan replies with a frown and hugs her close.

Tao makes a gagging noise from the door.

“So are we starting now or not? Sehun’s getting impatient and if he calls me Peach another time I will get upset, I don’t care if it’s his birthday and he’s gross with his boyfriend. He needs to stop.”

“Wei Zhe isn’t here yet.”

“Tough.” Tao huffs just as the door rings. “Well, that better be him or I’ll pull a Kim Junmyeon on him and yell at him over the phone.”

“Hey!”

 

“Mom, if Eunbyul loses a tooth for me, is the tooth fairy coming to me too?” Yubi asks into the peaceful atmosphere after tea and cake time.

“What did you two do?” Yeeun suspects, sitting straight as fast as she can.

Yubi stretches her hand out, another tiny white tooth shining on her palm. Eunbyul grins. One front tooth is missing.

Tooth number six.

 

.

“Yifan?”

“Hm?” Yifan hums sleepily into Junmyeon’s neck the same night, only ever satisfied falling asleep while spooning her with his larger frame.

Junmyeon strokes over the fine hairs on his forearm. He has made her feel that happiest she ever thought she could and she thinks she stopped doubting, fearing that he is going to let go. He deserves to know she does not want to let go of him either.

“Tomorrow let’s go to the City Hall and get registered for marriage.”

Yifan hums into her neck again and although he does not say anything, Junmyeon can feel the satisfied smile curved on his lips right against her skin.

**Author's Note:**

> The idea encorelight had was Tao and Sehun fighting over their sibling and its affection, making Yifan and Junmyeon running out of ideas how to make them stop. I hope this leaves plenty of room for her to write her own sequel with exactly that more drawn out and detailed. 
> 
> As you noticed Junmyeon's partners are both of Chinese decent. This is intentional and I tried to look for names for the stepsiblings on the father's side that are somewhat also Chinese. If you're bored look up the name meanings (personally I love Yubi).
> 
> The pup is basically Rourou, Kris' puppy that he purchased while I was writing this. Originally I wanted to place Candy, but as my parents too have a poodle my heart went out to Rourou. But before Kris finally introduced us to him formally my Meigeni friend Rosie screamed at me that Chocoball would be a fantastic name. In return for her tagging every tumblr post with Rourou with my suggested tag, I name the dog Chocoball. The pup choosing scene is almost exactly how my family got its dog back in the day and I received permission from my mother to adapt it for the story. 
> 
> I hope I have written about divorce and the emotional damages with appropriate respect. There are so many more things I could have taken into account, especially the effects of the divorce and new step families on Tao and Sehun, but since this is from Suho's point of view, I have factored it out. 
> 
> One last thing: Usually I use female names for female characters, but for the sake of consistency from Of Lists and Galaxies I used the real names of Suho, Baekhyun and Luhan. 
> 
> THANKS FOR READING! 


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